Sports Hernia Blog

Millen to return in hopes of getting that elusive 4-12 mark

Matt_millen Fans in Detroit collectively vomited today as the Lions announced Matt Millen will be returning for his 7th season as team president/ jackass/ incompetent slob. While initially mistaking this news as a joke, the Hernia’s rock city mole was able to regain his composure and get a quick sound bite from the man who probably would have taken Rod Tidwell with the Texans #1 draft pick:

"I’m happy to be coming back and finish what I started here," Millen said while devouring a bucket of wings and wearing his game worn Raiders jersey. "Under my watch we’ve gone 2-14, 3-13 twice, 5-11 twice, and 6-10. The only crappy record we haven’t had yet is 4-12. But you can damn sure bet we’ll be shooting for that in 2007. Pencil that in your little scribble book."

The following is a list of Millen’s highlights and accomplishments as team president:



  1. Gerrard Sir Hornypants

    January 2, 2007 at 6:24 pm

    what an UNbelievable jackass….

  2. Jay

    January 2, 2007 at 6:27 pm

    That picture is amazing. His whole being is amazing. And why does he refused to pick the wing sauce out of his mustache?

  3. G

    January 8, 2007 at 4:59 pm

    As long as William Clay Ford owns the Lions they will continue to suck. End of story. How bout those Tigers?

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