Sports Hernia Blog

Schaub signs with Texans, takes out life insurance

Tricky Math: 6 touchdowns + 6 interceptions x 0 NFL wins = 6 years, $48 million

Houston, TX – After signing a six-year, $48 million deal with the Houston Texans, QB Matt Schaub took out a record-setting life insurance policy. The Texans presented the third year winless backup with $7 million in guaranteed money, along with titanium body armor, but Schaub still wisely penned his own deal with State Farm.

Immediately after Schaub signed his name on the Texans? contract, a black eye suddenly appeared on his face and he began to complain about internal pain.  Meanwhile, David Carr, the former Texans QB who was released from the team Friday, was seen doing cartwheels and yelling ?wheee!? in a local park.


  1. Chris Chandler

    March 24, 2007 at 2:56 pm

    I think I would instantly disintegrate if I was introduced to that offensive line

  2. Mike Jones

    March 25, 2007 at 10:16 am

    People who don’t live in Houston ought not to comment on the o-line. Rather, the fault is David Carr, the “scapegoat” as the all-knowing media would say

  3. Someone who doesn't live in Houston

    March 25, 2007 at 10:45 am

    Um, you’re right. The Texans would have full trophy room if it wasn’t for that Carr guy.


    March 26, 2007 at 4:17 pm


  5. Britney Asbourne

    September 13, 2007 at 1:21 pm

    Texans are the best team in the NFL, As far as I m concerned, we have great fans, really the whole city of Houston will say that. In Houston if you want to

    watch the Texans in style good luck with that, all the Texans premium seats get sold out the day they show up in ticketmaster. Texans tickets are sometimes 2

    or even 5 times the face value. Anyhow If you get lost I have a new sight for u guys
    Texans tickets
    Anyhow I though this is something would interest you, a tip from a Texans fan GO Texans!!!
    God bless Football

  6. IrriblyDila

    October 16, 2008 at 12:08 am

    Keep up the good work.

  7. Debt Settlement

    January 15, 2009 at 7:13 am

    Thank you for such a thoughtful post! Keep up the good work.

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