Sports Hernia Blog

Pacman Jones begins image restoration by becoming bad guy in wrestling

Slick_wwf_manager_and_legend_2Pacman_jones

Could Pacman’s entrance into the wrestling world also mean the return of Slick?

Accompanied by a gigantic posse that may or may not be cleared to enter next month’s battle royal, Pacman Jones and his agent issued the following reasons for joining TNA wrestling:

–  There is no better way to get back into the good graces of the American public than by hitting someone from behind with a steel chair while someone distracts them.

–  Using the British Bulldogs’ dog Matilda as his tag team partner will most likely draw NFL fans to the wrestling broadcasts as well as praise from the media and PETA.

–  Aligning with yet another sport tainted with drugs and murder is just smart business.

–  Can’t find a decent job at Cheetah’s, The Crazy Horse or Chip ‘N Dolls.

–  Despite strong ties to the Bengals, Slick is looking to return to the business and manage "a huge star who like ho’s."

–  "Pacman" is just a natural fit in the wrestling world.

–  Taunting the crowd is an encouraged practice.

–  Would like an opportunity to kick the crap out of wrestling obsessed David Eckstein.

–  A channel like SpikeTV will allow him to wear ass-less tights.

–  TNA just has to stand for Tits ‘N Ass.

–  Thinks wrestling is real.

2 Comments

  1. Von Kaiser

    July 31, 2007 at 12:24 am

    In all seriousness, unless he’s dead, TNA would be very smart to read this and put Slick and Pacman together. That would make for an intense wrestler-crowd interaction as well as horrify pretty much everyone outside of TNA.

  2. Mike

    April 17, 2008 at 2:26 am

    That’s funny stuff.

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