Sports Hernia Blog

12 dead, 37 injured as overeager Shaq jumps into crowd for loose ball

Shaq_flying_super_punch_splash_4

(PHOENIX, AZ) — Chaos erupted in America West Arena yesterday as Shaquille O’Neal crashed into the Phoenix crowd, instantly killing 12 and injuring 37 unlucky fans.  Sources say two young boys are still missing, with one believed to be trapped in Shaq’s ass and the other said to be lodged somewhere inside his jersey.

A spokesman from a Phoenix area hospital offered a brief statement saying the 7’2, 490 lb Shaq had been brought into the ER to dislodge the youngsters.

Suns officials are reportedly planning on giving Sumo wrestler fat suits to all fans in the first ten rows for remaining home games.

9 Comments

  1. Carolyn

    March 10, 2008 at 10:34 am

    Stop it – I saw it live and cracked up. But this post – this is my new “live” memory.

  2. Von Kaiser

    March 10, 2008 at 10:42 am

    That looks like a finishing move in Tekken or Mortal Combat.

  3. Stonehands

    March 10, 2008 at 12:55 pm

    The guy selling Bud Light is impossible to distract.

    Must. Sell. More. Beer.

  4. gerrard sir hornypants

    March 10, 2008 at 1:00 pm

    HA!! yes.. that dude is ALL business

  5. JohnnyD

    March 10, 2008 at 2:44 pm

    Is that one dude actually getting a Shaq Fu Face Punch?

  6. Ricky - Sixers4guidos

    March 10, 2008 at 7:11 pm

    I’ve heard the UNHCR has been alerted, any updates?

  7. Soy

    March 10, 2008 at 7:40 pm

    FEMA will be there in May.

  8. Stonehands

    March 11, 2008 at 2:43 pm

    His feet have to be bigger than Andre the Giant’s.

  9. Jimmy dean

    March 18, 2013 at 12:09 am

    Hi

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