Sports Hernia Blog

Raiders bizarre fanbase still blowing our minds


What’s going on here, did they kill Darth Vader?  We don’t understand this.  Please Raiders fans, be clearer.  To be honest, the "Raiders" have always confused us, like, the actual name/mascot — are they pirates, or just anything that "raids"?

I don’t know, maybe that’s what makes it dangerous.  Gives these fans too much room to interpret.

We imagine the brainstorming session where the Raiders fan council recommended the slaying of Vader went something like this
(translated into modern English for comprehension purposes):

Raider guy with spiked shoulders:  "How about Darth Vader be part of Raider Nation?  He’s black, he raids planets and stuff, even destroys them."

Raider guy with skull mask:  "Yeah, but he’s kind of dorky.  What’s next, Spock?!" (laughter, incredible violence)

Raider guy who is an actual demon:  "Let’s meet half-way.  You can use him, but he must be dead and deflated."

ALL:  "Here here!"


  1. Upstate Underdog

    September 9, 2008 at 4:09 pm

    What about Darth Raider?

  2. Stonehands

    September 9, 2008 at 5:14 pm

    What about Dark Helmet?

  3. seth

    September 9, 2008 at 5:16 pm

    what about Darth horny?

  4. mang

    September 9, 2008 at 6:54 pm

    How about…Chris Berman?

  5. Da Gusha

    September 10, 2008 at 1:01 pm

    How about GWAR?

  6. HC Blogger

    September 11, 2008 at 10:49 am

    Yes they are bizzzzzzare for a team that has not one in what feels like forever. But the good news is that the quarter back can throw a ball 90 yards from his knee’s which is were he might be most of the season.

  7. Sports Blogger

    September 15, 2008 at 12:41 pm

    How about “Darth Loser” or “Darth Davis”..

  8. yert

    October 4, 2011 at 7:26 pm

    so the person who wrote this is a fucking idiot and literally doesnt know what they’re typing about?

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