Sports Hernia Blog

Kruk?s hair rises to the occasion under October spotlight


We?ve seen a lot from from Krukie and his hair over the past year and change, but it looks like our buddy?s buddy has taken a cue from Manny Ramirez and found that rare zone under circumstances where the stakes couldn?t possibly get any higher — October baseball.

Has the presence of his beloved Phillies caused this latest flowing masterpiece?  Or could it be the absence of unforgiving wind gusts in Tampa’s air-controlled dome?  Or is it that his hair has been playing possum all season long, knowing full well Kruk would make it to the October stage, and has waited for this very moment to pounce on America like Superfly Snuka?

Whatever it is… actually, what the hell is it?  Here are some guesses, but feel free to chime in with what you might call the look you see here:

  • Poindexter up front, Chewbacca in the back
  • Beertini up front, keg of moonshine in the back
  • Danny Zuko up front, King Slender in the back
  • Brown Twizzlers up front, hairy marshmallows in the back
  • Class picture up front, Smokin’ in the boys room in the back
  • 1998 Steve Phillips up front, revolting inmates in the back


Kruk’s checkered hair history in chronological order:

John Kruk kicks off 2007 season telling stylist to "give me the Melrose with a splash of Giambi"
Update: Kruk’s condition worsening
Update: Jailbreak inside John Kruk’s mullet sprouts sudden perm
Kruk’s hair stuck in a monsterous slump
Kruk kicks off 2008 season with unkempt Ewok look
Kruk’s flaccid hair stuck in typical July slump


  1. Marv

    October 24, 2008 at 8:24 am

    Hi, I’m just waking up from a short coma after clicking on that beertini link. Thanks for nothing, Sports Hernia.

  2. Stonehands

    October 24, 2008 at 10:52 am

    Incredible Hulk up front, Thor in the back.

  3. Marv

    October 24, 2008 at 2:12 pm

    Swamp in the front, weeds in the back
    Mousse in the front, goose in the back
    Mudcake in the front, mudflap in he back
    CEO in the front, B&E in the back
    Superman’s fat cousin in the front, Flair’s fat son in the back

  4. CopsandRobbers

    October 24, 2008 at 5:38 pm

    “The Mel Gibson” from movies such as Lethal Weapon and Braveheart

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