Sports Hernia Blog

And where the hell was I?


Oh yeah, JAIL

Frank Drebin and the fellas lose a great one today.  Celebrate the work of the embattled but well meaning Detective Nordberg right here.

Note Please watch the hilarious work by judge Jackie Glass who made sure to take a sip of her fountain soda before beginning the sentencing (Before I ruin your life, let me just get in a healthy sip here).  And even more praise for issuing the sentence like he was in there for a speeding ticket:

"In addition to the $25 administrative assessment and the $150 DNA fee…"

Yeah, in addition to these minor fees we also have to hit you with 15 years of prison rape by Aryan Nation.

And, for the hell of it, a short ride down memory lane…


  1. Stonehands

    December 5, 2008 at 3:50 pm

    Det. Nordberg: Drugs… drugs…

    Frank: Nurse! Get this man some drugs! Can’t you see he’s in pain?
    [nurse administers drugs]

    Det. Nordberg: No… no…
    [pulls Frank towards him]

    Det. Nordberg: Heroin, Frank! Heroin…

    Frank: Uh… that’s a pretty tall order, Nordberg. You’ll have to give me a couple of days on that one.

  2. kevin

    December 5, 2008 at 4:57 pm

    I often wonder to myself, “And where the hell was I?”

  3. James

    December 5, 2008 at 6:14 pm

    The Infantile Judge Glass, The ridicules Las Vegas Police Dept. and The Goldman family should be happy now. Now shut the H**l up and go home.

  4. Millie

    December 5, 2008 at 9:29 pm

    Does Judge Glass have a sister in Alaska that was a vice presidential candidate????

  5. Tibee

    December 5, 2008 at 9:37 pm

    OJ will be okay

    You can’t keep the good ones down

  6. tamtam

    December 6, 2008 at 1:53 pm

    wilma: *sobbing* oh my poor nordberg! he was such a sweet man, frank! he never wanted to hurt anyone! who would do such a thing?

    ed: its hard to tell

    frank: a roving gang of thugs, a blackmailer, an angry husband, a gay lover…

    wilma: *sobbing*

    ed: frank! get a hold of yourself!

    frank: he was a good cop. needlessly cut down and ambushed by some cowardly hoodlum.

    ed: thats no way for a man to die

    frank: yeah, you’re right, ed. a parachute not opening, thats the way i wanna die. getting caught in the gears of a combine. having your nuts bit off by a laplander (sp?), thats the way i wanna go

    wilma: *shrieking sobs* oh frank! this is terrible!

    ed: dont you worry wilma, you’re husband is going to be allright. dont you worry about a thing. just think positively. never let a doubt enter your mind.

    frank: he’s right, wilma. although i wouldnt wait until the last minute to fill out those organ donor cards

    wilma: *shrieking sobs*

    ed: what im saying wilma, is when nordberg gets better he’ll be welcomed back with open arms

    frank: unless, of course, he’s a drooling vegetable, but i think thats common sense

    wilma: *shrieking sobs*

  7. zen wizard

    December 7, 2008 at 3:31 pm

    Is there some rule that judges can’t summarize those “counts” and “consecutivelies” and “eligible for parole’s” at the end?

    That all gets as complicated as a “credit default swap” if you ask me.

    Especially when the Court TV eggheads can’t even figure it out.

    Can’t they just say, “In summary, this means that you will serve X years and be eligible for parole in Y years.”

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