Sports Hernia Blog

Bobcats take heat off Mets’ patch controversy with new NASCAR jammies

Bobcats-uniforms

After spotting the latest road jerseys worn by the Charlotte Cheetahs and promptly vomiting, the always fair Hernia mole did his due diligence and arranged a focus group panel centered around the embarrassing unis, as he tends to hate everything anyway. 

Here's a look at how he netted out:

Jessica Tuckerson: "The Bobcats, are they that team that just lost 100-0?"

Whitlock Morganfrost: "Looks like they stole sheets from a 5-year old's race car bed.  Translation: I like it."

Jason Finkelberry: "Clearly Jordan lost another bet to Marvin the Martian from Space Jam."

Al Fundies: "Wasn't that jersey a free giveaway at Sonic?"

Samantha Supplenips: "I boned me a Bobcat."

Bertha Porkfellow: "Them black and white squares remind me of that Othella game."

Skip Thornwall: "If the reason they are checkered is because NASCAR is king in Charlotte, then they are insane.  What the fuck."

Vern Fundquist:  "This is Flair country, Skip, fuck NASCAR."

Barney Coopersmith: "Well, they ain't the Fryberg Turtles."

Al Czervik: "Oh! You buy a uniform like this you get a free bowl of soup!"

Louis Lewis: "I'll trade you for a Joe Pepitone jersey."

Will Smith: "If you wear those in the park, old dudes will wind up playing chess on you."

Nadine Cherry: "I used to wear those in my first job."

William Walton: "It doesn't even matter what they're wearing, look at how they
plaaaay the game. This isn't NBA basketball, they're terrrrrrrrrible."

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