Sports Hernia Blog

Julian Tavarez wins Hernia immunity until we say otherwise

Newly signed Nationals pitcher Julian Tavarez has always been known for frequent headhunting, his insane temper and filthy dance moves, but never for memorable quotes like this:

“Why did I sign with the Nationals?” Tavarez said told a group of reporters.  “When you go to a club at 4 in the morning, and you’re just
waiting, waiting, a 600-pounder looks like J. Lo.  And to me this is Jennifer Lopez right here. It’s 4 in the morning.  Too much to drink. So, Nationals: Jennifer Lopez to me.”

We love how it’s a 600-pound chick, not 200 or 300 pounds.  This Julian
is wise beyond his years as he made sure he didn’t offend all the 300 pounders he plans on banging this season.

This gem puts him in the driver’s seat, shockingly ahead of Sir Charles, in the early running for quote of the year.


  1. Zen Wizard

    March 19, 2009 at 12:24 pm

    I see no possible way that quote might offend anyone in the town who supported the franchise with their taxpayer largesse.

  2. Flanders

    March 20, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    Wow Tavarez should really be playing in Buffalo even if it means being in the minor leagues. He would love it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *