Sports Hernia Blog

Donald Trump’s hair nearly pulls an Andy Dufresne


The dead Golden Retriever glued to Donald Trump's head nearly pulled off the improbable last night and escaped its longtime owner after decades of captivity. 

Sadly though, the ambitious jailbreak proved to be nothing but a brief tryst with freedom as a rare, industrial strength glue courtesy of Lucius Fox managed to keep the sudden upward thrust at bay.

Those in the know claim the attempted escape came shortly after a heated argument between the two, but we're told cooler heads prevailed by the middle of the third quarter, where a smiling Trump was seen feeding his toupee heaping handfuls of Snausages.

[Photo via MockSession]

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