Sports Hernia Blog

BREAKING: Ron Duguay having sex with your wife right now

Ron Duguay_about to bone your wife

Reports have confirmed that New York Rangers legend and current MSG hockey analyst, Ron Duguay, is boning your wife right now on your kitchen floor. 

Sources say the notorious coochie whisperer is pleasuring her in ways you never could imagine and intends on finishing her off with a move he learned from Sting a few years ago while on a Yoga retreat in the Maldives.

Our sources have also confirmed that it is pointless for you to go home and attempt to salvage the relationship, and that it's probably best if all parties just "move on."

Oh, and all of your crap is neatly arranged in the front yard.