Sports Hernia Blog

Study: Every reliever in baseball is either hammered or stupid

Joba channels Giovanni Ribisi

Early this morning Braves pitcher Cristhian Martinez became the latest reliever to hop into the drunk tank with an apparent deep thirst for horrible press.  Yes, another MLB-related DUI.  A little over a week ago, frequently embattled Yankee Joba Chamberlain somehow managed to rip his ankle to bloody shreds simply by jumping on a trampoline.  That same day, seemingly bored of calling the 60-day DL his home, tubby reliever Bobby Jenks was arrested for DUI, property damage and leaving the scene of an accident.  The day before that, former No. 1 overall pick Matt Bush was arrested after hitting a 72-year-old motorcyclist in a hit and run DUI.  And two weeks before that incident, the Mets freaking bullpen catcher, Eric Langill, was charged with DUI after crashing in a "single-car rollover" at a traffic circle in Port St. Lucie.

In short, if you're a reliever for a Major League Baseball team, you must do something asinine, and you must do it now.