Sports Hernia Blog

Aspiring wordsmith managed a rare and ingenious ‘Tweet Feat’

Barstool Chicago

Here's how The Sports Hernia scored the groundbreaking er… message:

1) Tweeted at the most talked-about athlete in sports at the moment while implicating that Bill Simmons was either gay or a pedophile. (+2) 

2) Got a RT from Bill Simmons, something we are sure @MikeSilvaMedia might literally KILL for. (+1) 

3) Used the word 'Cum' in the Tweet. (+7) 

4) Announced its homophobic tendencies. (0) 

5) Failed to specify whether Simmons was a homosexual or heterosexual pedophile. (-23)

Total Score: GET FUCKED

Editor's note: this hosehead is NOT affiliated with Barstool Chicago.  Apologies to @BarstoolBigCat for not using something called 'Google'. I will now go snort Fun Dip until Sunday in lieu of blogging. Viva La Stool?


  1. Slob

    April 30, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    Your shitty blog is apparently the low, as you can’t bother to look to see if that account is even linked to Barstool. Clown.

  2. Slob

    April 30, 2013 at 6:58 pm

    Much better.

  3. Jp

    April 30, 2013 at 7:00 pm

    Who puts up a blog like this without even checking the account?
    A 5 second vetting of that account would be pretty clear it’s just a random asshole

  4. BarstoolChicago

    April 30, 2013 at 7:29 pm

    Holy shit this website is an eyesore. Who reads this swill

  5. TheSportsHernia

    April 30, 2013 at 7:31 pm

    Our bad. Fixed. No excuse. Agreed.

  6. TheSportsHernia

    April 30, 2013 at 7:32 pm

    We just learned about ‘Google’ and ‘Search’ because of those. Sorry for the error.

  7. TheSportsHernia

    April 30, 2013 at 7:34 pm

    Nobody. Truth be told – we are taking classes online to up our skillz. Come back in a month.

  8. Jp

    April 30, 2013 at 8:08 pm

    I know you’re making light of this but you basically slandered an entire site without so much as a quick check. Yes you may not be like Grantland or something but how about the people that did see your original post and won’t come back a second time to see the update?

  9. Paolo X

    April 30, 2013 at 10:30 pm

    Ah please please, let’s give the Hernia some forgiveness for his sins this time.

    He does not do it often and he’ll be a lot more careful not to do it again.

    He’s made his amends today and most everyone is allowed an occasional bad day right?

    If you want to punk on anyone, ESPN and the entire “Jets Nation” and a few other fucks on the East Coast deserve far more shots than they are getting on here or or many a blog.

    For example, ESPN’s SportsCenter on Monday night was inexcusable between chat about gay athletes and baseball for just the first 15 minutes WTF! As if they are really “holier than thou” in Bristol those fucks!

  10. Marv

    May 1, 2013 at 3:36 am

    I drink your swill. I drink it up!

  11. drunk_dean_martin

    May 1, 2013 at 12:29 pm

    Fixed would be taking the blatantly wrong post down, not leaving it up for potential pageviews and more controversy.

  12. TheSportsHernia

    May 1, 2013 at 2:23 pm

    JP: If that means you’re not coming back, this entire thing was well worth it.

  13. aj

    May 2, 2013 at 2:38 am

    Enjoy the barstool pageviews for now till the ultimate failure of your terrible site. Literally a nutless monkey could do better. Fucking chimps can Google in 2013.

  14. TheSportsHernia

    May 2, 2013 at 5:52 am

    Can chimps engage in intercourse while they google in 2013?

  15. TheSportsHernia

    May 2, 2013 at 5:52 am

    We can always count on you Marv.

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